it's sickening, and i've allowed it to happen. i've always told myself that this is something i could avoid, that i could turn my back on this feeling and just live. despite the regrets, the disappointments and heartbreaks in the world, i always thought it was possible to keep hope and strength in every action and every event of my life, because i've always felt the good times outweight the bad.
the fact is, cynicism beat down my door with ugly fists today.
high hopes flying from one corner of the universe to the next, then crash-landing with the weight of the world on their shoulders.
i hate feeling like this and i truly, truly hope it's not like this everytime. i miss unadulterated joy.
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